ooops, i'm doing it again.

for the longest time, i've been trying to keep this blog level-headed by limiting all my rants and raves to my other (not blogger) blog , just so i could pass off as someone "cool," but i'm giving up. i now realize that if i am to attract readers and get internet fame, then i need to start writing something about myself, and stop getting delusional about passing for some intelligent being who comes disguised as a dilettante, when that's all i ever am: a dilettante.

i have come to the realization that i need to market myself. this i learned from nalts of the viral video genius fame. okay, it's not really nalts who taught me this bit of information, but it was he who made me realize that marketing oneself isn't really cheesy, because let's face it, everyone wants to be heard, and seen, and lauded - that's why people go to the internet. i've also heard a lot about people wanting to be part of a cyber community, so i'm not gonna follow that thread. there's been enough talk about that already.

so i'm now officially embarking on an advertising ploy - that is, to visit other people's blogs and websites, leave comments on their entries / sites, leave my url on their comments page, and go through a day's work while keeping my fingers crossed, wishing, desperately hoping and praying that these people whose sites i have visited would be kind enough to go to my blog and read junk i write.

which isn't easy, i tell you, because i've been there. done that. visited people's pages, left comments, got visited, stuff. but the people who visited weren't the kind of people i'd like to visit and drop comments. for a while i was glad i had two or three people dropping by my blog, but it became ****ingly frustrating when noone else would come, so i deleted my old blogger blog and started with this one, all the while telling myself that i am not gonna make this sound like the old one.

but i can't help it. to quote a yahoo messenger audible, it's lonely being me. so i'm just gonna go through the whole thing for the second time, and have enough conviction that this blog is going to see the light of day, no matter what. i guess this is going to be a good exercise on patience because getting an audience takes an awful lot of time. failure on this exercise would mean i would have to start from scratch again, because i know i can't accept that people don't find me funny or good enough to be read, which will result in yet another blog (aaaarrrrrggggghhhh, please don't let me do that again).

read me read me read me. i'll try to be funny. inspiring. reflective. you want anger? i can give you that, too. heck, just tell me what to write, 'kay? i'll write for you. i'll be your whore.

why do i have this feeling that the previous paragraph sounds a little too desperate? i don't get it. :/